About A Girl

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may hangover pa rin sa birthday?!?! kamusta naman? nagcelebrate na nga nung 21 at naghapi hapi na nung 29, aba’t may extension pa ngayon 30!

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maraming maraming salamat po sa mga bumati sa kin kanina.

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kay ate weng

at sa mga taong SLEC..

kay mam lou

kay emman

kay mam jules

kay jetox

kay mam rhia

kay lester

kay mam thek

kay marlon

kay sir odie

kay mam tines

kay mam sarah

kay mam anne

kay mam millet

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ayan.. maraming maraming maraming salamat po! haaaay! siguro naman mapipirme na ko sa bahay bukas kahit holiday! naku po!

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maraming salamat po sa walang sawang bumabati sakin kahit hindi nila talaga alam kung kailan nga ba ang totoo kong birthday. hehehe!

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kay jeds - na pagpatak pa lang ng alas-dose e kumakanta na ng hapi birthday.

kay lucy - yum! maraming salamat! tulog ka ulit dito!

kay bez - maraming salamat sa pagpapaiyak mo sakin! kaibigan ka talaga! hayup! biru lang!!! oi sobra kitang namiss! langya ka ang tagal mo kong hindi tinext! buti pumunta ka kanina. gusto ko na sanang magtampo sayo e. hehehehe! pero kahit sabihin mong wag salamat, salamat pa rin! 

kay ate she - aba! pasalubong ko ah hehehe! salamat sa pag-greet mo last 21 napasaya mo talaga ko astig!

kay mich - salamat sa pagkanta mo kahit sa text lang hehehe!

kay viene - salamat sa greeting! hanep sa get-up kanina ah! summer na summer hahahaha! wednesday ah?!

kay nija - salamat sa pagkanta kahit brownout ata nun kanina

kay mudrax at papadir - salamat po ng maraming maraming marami! alabyu!

kay dhae - achuk! maraming salamat! may balita ako tungkol sa yo tska kay achuk hahahahaha! totoo kaya? miss na kita bakla!

kay kuya jikjik - marami pong salamat! sayang hindi kita nakita kaninang umaga hahahaha!

kay reigna - ang cheap! hindi man lang tumawag! hahahahaha! biru lang bebiku! lam mo namang lab na lab kita e! miss na kita! kelan ba tayo magkikita ulet!

kay blesa - hoi batsie! yang sked mong pasaway ah! hindi tuloy tayo matuloy tuloy! panay na ang drawing natin ah! baka naman mamya e tapos na ang spiderman3 sa sinehan hindi pa rin tayo nakakanood! hahaha!

kay ate neng - salamat po sa greeting! you are indeed God’s blessing to me. salamat po!

kay bhel - maraming salamat po! bakit hindi ka na nagreply ah hehehehe! demanding ako! salamat salamat!

kay 027564800 - sino kaya to? pero kung balak mong bumati, pasensya na hindi ko napansin na tumatawag ka pala. pero maraming salamat na nga kung ganun.

kay clarj - astig mo mare! isang text lang sayo dumating ka kaagad. sexy mo tlga! hayup naman!

kay jen - ui! ayan hindi na kita ina-ate ah! salamat sa lagi mong pagsama sa mga lakad kahit galing ka parati ng work! sarap kanina no! ayan ah! may nadiscover na tayong masarap order-in!

kay rc - salamat sa iyong greeting! nawa’y intact pa rin ang daliring sinabi mong naputol. hehehe!

kay kael - nung isang araw pa kong binati, pero kuripot pa rin sa greeting. hahahaha! yessss! parati nang updated ang friendster ah! hahahahaha!

sa mga crew at staff ng pizza hut - na kumanta ng happy birthday at tinawag akong jessie! maraming maraming salamat po!

sa mga member ng singles’ ministry na nakatambay sa booth kanina - maraming salamat po sa inyong pagbati! ;p

kay lucy/jen/mich/clarj/leo - maraming maraming maraming maraming salamat po sa pagpunta/pagsama o kung ano mang tawag dun. ang sayang trip nyan! saya saya ng 21st birthday ko dahil sa inyo. nawa’y hindi isang malaking drawing ang EK next week! hahahaha! sa uulitin mga parekoi!

sa aking pamily - next time fridays na sana hehehe! salamat pong marami! sarap libre! hahahaha!

kay papa God - maraming salamat po! 21 na ko hahahaha! nyaiks! tenk yu po sa lahat ng blessings! glory to you! salamat po talaga!

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matanda na ba ko?! 21? wala pa naman yun db? hahahaha! sa lahat po ng bumati sakin, nung 21 man o nung 29, maraming maraming salamat po! sarap ng birthday ko ngayon! mahal ko kayong lahat! ;p

arggghh!! asan na mga testimonials at comments ko?!?!?!

"Growing old is mandatory. Growing up is optional."

haay! it’s april. it’s summer. i love summer! kaso nga lang nitong mga nakaraang araw SUPER INIT!!!!!! as in SUPER DUPER INIT!!!! parang gustong mabutas ever ng bunbunan kech kapag lumalabas ako sa initan!

unang una sa lahat. gusto ko lamang magpasalamat sa mga taong bumati sa’kin ngayong araw na to! pinapasaya nyo tlaga ko! astig!!!

kay reb - na bumungad ng isang masayang happy birthday sakin nung naginternet ako kanina pagkagising ko

kay ate she - na tinext ako pero hapon ko na nabasa. astig mong magreload ang bilis! salamat!

kay roan - maraming salamat! hot momma ka pa rin! hahahaha!

kay jona - maraming salamat! miss ko na ikaw!

at kay awie - na binati ako kahit kalagitnaan pa lang ng april hehehehe!

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mahal ko kayong lahat. pero me sasabihin akong secret sa inyo. hindi ko birthday ngayon bwahahahahahahahaha! palagay ko babatiin nyo rin ako next yr kasi hindi naman kayo nagbabasa ng blog ko e hehehe! alabyu pa rin! salamat salamat! pinasaya nyo tlga ko! astig!

  "life is better shared."

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amazing! three weeks na kong hindi nakakaorder ng java chip frap! and for that matter, three weeks na rin akong hindi tumatambay sa kapihan! i spent this saturday at home. i woke up around seven and thought of spending the whole morning at starbucks but found myself surfing the internet and ended up sleeping yet again. when i woke up (for the second time), i saw my sister painting our gate. (Note: She has been painting all by herself the past week! It’s not that easy a task painting grills and curves! Imagine the horror!). so i went to get a cup of paint and helped her out. it was only later that afternoon when i said that i had to go somewhere and promised to bring her back something to eat. i was also able to wash not just my clothes but my sheets last saturday. something that i think i could never have done had i continued my pursuit for my favorite coffee-based blended drink!

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sunday. i went to church with my bestfriend. after which, we went to ATC, goofed off and took pictures! we then went to our next stop - festival mall — to grab a bite and meet up with another friend — Mich. xmpre! mawawala ba ang chikahan! Jen came around 2. more chikahan! more picture taking! namiss ko tuloy sila! argh! today’s generation is just sooo blessed for having easy access to camera phones and digicam! kasi ang naaalala ko nung panahong highschool ako, pang mayaman lang ang digicam at di pa uso ang mga camera phone! i miss them soooo much! nakakatawa at nakakatuwa kung paanong even after all those years na magkakahiwalay kami, ngayon we remained friends — the closest that is. argh! ang sarap i-share ng buhay! ang saya!

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[lucy and jc, ATC]

..hmm anong sinisilip mo jc!..
[books for less]

    [mahiga daw ba?!?!?!?! pambihira!!]

[yum papasa nang egyptian! hehehehe!]

cge magmeditate habang tumatawa!

eto ang panalo!

mga nakakalokong ngiti! wahahaha!

[lunod na ko sa tatlong baso ng coke!]
sa Don Hens

xmpre magcCR sana si kuya nung hinarang namin xa para magpapicture heheheh!

movietime na!!! THE REAPING!

hahahah! picture ko lang ang maayos pano kasi reklamo kayo ng reklamo hehehehehe! [sa Don Henrico's]

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argh!!! salamat mga bakla sa isang napakamemorable na birthday celebration kahit malayo pa! heheheh! alabyu!

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happy birthday yumyum! tatanda ka na ulet wahahaha! alabyu!

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kanina. sa madilim na mundo ng microscopy kung saan ako madalas na feeling nagsstargazing. dalawang earthling ang naguusap. sabi nung isa. kailangan kong magrelax. tapos binanggit nya ang spa. umayon naman ang isa pang earthling na nakakarelax sa spa. sabi nya nga. gusto ko rin magpamasahe. sabi nung isa. bakit naman hindi. nakikiliti ako. sabi nung isang earthling. nasasawa na daw ang mga earthling sa buhay nila. yung isa ayaw nang magtrabaho. wala daw kasing challenge. gustong lumipat. maraming pamparelax ang naisip. spa. masahe. facial. sine. concert. reflexology. hanggang nauwi ang isa sa mga earthling sa pagbili na lang ng bagong sapatos.

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bumaling ang pansin ng earthling sakin. tinanong nya ko. hindi ka pa ba nagsasawa. ako. magsasawa. bakit. naisip ko. bakit naman ako magsasawa e dalawang buwan pa lang ang nakakalipas mula nung una akong napadpad sa lugar nila. pero naisip ko rin. ano na ang magiging ako pagkatapos ng isang taon. makikita ko pa rin kaya ang sarili ko sa lugar nila. o baka naman makita ko na ang sarili ko sa ibang lugar. dun sa hindi ko naiintindihan ang mga tao sa paligid ko. minumura na pala ako nakangiti pa rin ako. o baka naman isang araw makakita na lang ako sa kalsada ng lakas ng loob para mag-iba ng propeyson. ang totoo hindi ko alam. pero sa ngayon. nasasabi ko na masaya ako. bakit kaya. siguro dahil talagang masaya ako. pero paano kung hindi na masaya. ayoko munang isipin. nakakatangang magisip parati. pero masayang magdaydream. pero hangga’t nandito ang ngayon. ayoko muna tong ipagpalit.

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hindi ako makapaniwalang april na. dati rati hindi ako makahintay na matapos yung externship program. ngayon april na. tatanda na naman ako. haaay! parang ayoko pa ata. soon i would be thirty. would i live to be thirty? where would i be by then? nagala ko na kaya ang buong pilipinas nung mga panahong yon?

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it’s summer but i have no plans yet. i don’t like plans. naffrustrate ako pag hindi natutuloy. nagtatampo. normal naman siguro yun. pero ayoko pa rin ng feeling na ganon.

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i can’t wait for sunday. i can’t wait for another grande java chip frap. nalulungkot lang ako na yung starbucks buddy ko e on vacation — hindi mahagilap at hindi pwedeng hagilapin ng radar ko. haaay! im back on my own again. siguro nga tama na kailangan kong tanggapin na hindi ko xa makakasama parati. or worse baka hindi ko na sya makasama ulit. but i can’t do anything but accept the decisions made.

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warts removal? grabe! ang pangit ko! kung iniisip ko dating konti lang ang wart sa mukha ko, im sorry mali ako! dahil ang dami! ang dami dami dami! kinuryente at ngayon e lumabas na silang lahat!

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i still thank God for giving me my job today. i get to use my God-given license and i still get to be that little girl that i am. i’m happy. enough said.

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bakit kaya puro ‘only reminds me of you’ ang kantang naiisip ko?

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alam ko na ngayon kung bakit hindi pa rin ako binibigyan ni God ng boyfriend! kaya sa parating nagtatanong sakin, I’M STILL SINGLE!

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i need to unclutter my life!

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and i need to unwind!!!!!!!!

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i want to go to Puerto Galera on my birthday! kailangan ko ng kasama! huhuhuhu!

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gusto ko ng kape…

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it’s funny how times have changed. before, i was just a little girl who could only care less about the world but now, i choose to confront some of the things that the little girl in me would usually just ignore.

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i have someone close to my heart who for some reason opted to drift away from my radar. it was a choice actually — something that somehow both of us agreed to. i had it all going in my head — the issues that i wanted to clarify, the insights that i wanted to point out, the things that i wanted to say and how i was going to say it. i even tried to imagine how i’d feel when the time of confrontation comes. the thing is… it didn’t go exactly as i thought it would. the issues i wanted to clarify? check! the insights that i wanted to point out? check! the things that i wanted to say? check! but how i felt? my imagination didn’t even come close to how i felt afterwards. i felt really really bad. i wanted to cry so badly without holding back but i didn’t want anybody to hear me. i wanted to melt away and die without anybody noticing it. it was at that point when i realized that i had no one… no one but God.

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i can’t even remember my first encounter with the phrase "no one but God." before, i thought i knew what it meant but i was wrong — dead wrong. i think this is the first time in my twenty years of existence to cry as if my tearducts were about to be removed from my system for good. the tears just kept falling and falling from my already blood-shot eyes. i had no one but God. i had no one to scream my heart out to but Him. i felt really helpless. i was on my knees asking God to do the things that i had no control over. i can do nothing but pray. i felt a part of me is dying over and over again and that the pain won’t simply go away. i was heart-broken.

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my journey hasn’t ended (well… not yet). the point is little by little, God is making things known to me.

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i remember there was a time before when i was stranded, He pushed me to go on — egging me on and on and on and on — cheering me to run faster and faster. i was negative about my life, He uncovered great things about my everyday life that i should be thankful for. i was close to putting out my dying flame of hope, He gave me another spark. i was unhappy, He gave me joy. i was restless inside, He gave me peace. i fell down, He picked me up and gave me another chance. everytime i break, He picks up the pieces and i don’t know how but i’m whole again. He did these and more EVERY single day. He provides me with every single thing that i need — and those that i want, even. He never left. He never left.

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i don’t understand God. i do not know what He is thinking. but i don’t need to understand God. i may even go on with my whole life not understanding the things He is doing but i trust Him. i will always find peace in the thought that God brought me here and He will get me through anything. He has His ways — ways that i don’t know, even more do not understand.  all i know is that He healed me before, and He is doing it again. time will come, whether i notice it or not, when my heart (this heart that has been broken yet again into tiny platelet-sized unglueable pieces) will be glued back together again. for now, i’m still holding on to one promise, that time will come He will wipe my tears away.

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